Do you want more physical affection and thoughtfulness from your partner? Do you feel like the spontaneous little gestures and romance have fallen by the wayside in your relationship? We get it – it’s easy to slip into comfortable routines where you operate more like responsible roommates than adoring partners.

But you can rekindle sweet gestures of affection by making thoughtfulness a daily practice in your relationship again. Surprising your loved one with considerate actions – both big and small – makes them feel cherished and nurtures your bond.

Here are some thoughtful ways to express affection:

Leave Appreciative Notes

Hide short handwritten love notes in surprising spots – their purse, coat pocket, lunch bag, or pillow. The simple act of writing I love you, I appreciate you, You’re amazing means the world. Written words have a special sentimental power.

One woman leaves her husband voice memo “love letters” to find in the mornings when she’s up before him. He says these make his whole day.

Give Small Unexpected Gifts

Bring home little treats just because – their favorite flowers, candy bar, magazine, tea bags, craft beer. Random gifts don’t have to be expensive to show you were thinking about them. These spur-of-the-moment gestures nurture happiness.

One boyfriend has sweet edible arrangements delivered on random days his girlfriend has big presentations at work. Knowing he’s cheering her on means everything.

Cook Their Favorite Meal

Make their beloved comfort food on a whim – mac and cheese, pizza from that little place, chicken pot pie. Putting in the effort to make something you know they’ll love is a wonderful act of service and care.

One husband cooks his wife chocolate chip pancakes on stressful work mornings as she’s rushing out the door. Starting her day feeling so loved improves her whole day.

Give Massages to Relieve Stress

After an exhausting day, give them a neck, foot or back massage to melt away tension. Adding in essential oils, soft music and candles enhances the experience. Thoughtful touches are soothing balms.

One girlfriend gives her partner slow scalp massages when his seasonal allergies flare up. Her compassionate touch makes him feel nurtured.

Indulge Their Hobbies

Support what brings them joy in thoughtful ways – buy them art supplies if they love painting, leave a gift card for books at their favorite bookstore, and pick up hiking trail mix to fuel their weekend trekking. Noticing and enabling their passions shows you “get them.”

Send Sweet Surprises

Have flowers delivered on a random Tuesday just because. Mail them a care package of treats when they’re stressed. Text a song or poem that reminded you of them. Delighting your partner through surprises cultivates happiness and connection.

If you’d like more support thoughtfully nurturing your relationship, our Light Your Spark program can help. Visit www.lightyoursparks.com to learn more.

Small gestures of thoughtfulness water the seeds of affection and intimacy in your relationship. 

You can have it too!